As Isaac approaches 22 months, he’s gotten to the point where he puts himself to sleep pretty easily. At night now we put him down wide awake and he puts himself down within 15 minutes or so. I know, that’s to be expected, and it’s a nice change from having to spend 45 minutes or so trying to soothe him to sleep.
On the flip side though, sometimes I miss those times where the two of us would sit there and rock together, his head on my chest and me feeling the awesome satisfaction of knowing that my son found my presence comforting enough to be soothed and create a willingness to go to sleep. He’s also been sleeping through the night a majority of the time, which means we haven’t had many of our late night rocks (though a few nights ago I definitely woke up in his room having no idea what time it was or how long I’d been in there).
All of this leads to the simple fact: our little boy is growing up and gaining independence. It’s been a long time coming, and it’s something I’m glad is happening, but sometimes it’s weird to think that your little guy doesn’t need you as much any more. Just a humbling fact of life.
BUT, I’m not completely out of it.
Our routine on non-school days is that after lunch he takes a nap. Now, at this point in his life, I COULD take him in to his room, change his diaper, lay him down and walk out of his room. But I’m not ready for that. I take him in his room, change his diaper and rock him for a few minutes. He still snuggles up on me, gets his last kiss in and we rock for a few minutes before I lay him down in his crib and walk out. He’s still awake when I leave the room, but we’ve spent a few minutes of quality time together. I know he doesn’t need it, but I do. I’m just not letting it go yet.